How do. I’m Ben, a copywriter based in Leeds.

So, ever been shot?

I have.

Me: an innocent 11-year-old, playing Cannon Fodder on my Amiga 500.

My brother: a moron with an audience. Because nothing promotes acts of accidental violence like showing off to a mate.

Preening like a peacock - a peacock with an air rifle in its hands - my brother lined up my neck in his sights, took a deep breath and...

To this day, he claims he never meant to pull the trigger. But I'm sure I heard him mutter “Necks marks the spot” to his mate Dave before projectile met axis vertebra.

My parents say the only other time they’ve heard me scream like that was when I came into this world. Eugh.

Moral of the story?

Well, aside from the obvious (grossly negligent parenting is a literal pain in the neck), it's to show the power of a good story. After all, I've kept you reading all the way down here (156 words and counting).

And if I can keep you reading, I can keep your customers reading, too.

So gimme a call and we’ll shoot the breeze. Instead of my neck.

I’m good enough for this lot to pay me real money.